“You”, said Fletcher, looking uncompromisingly at Andrew, “were you rushing or were you dragging?”
This is of course the unforgettable scene from the critically acclaimed movie ‘Whiplash’. Now that you remember how the relentless jazz conductor, Terence Fletcher, challenges his drummer, Andrew, let’s break it down a bit.
This intense interaction highlights the fine line between success and failure in the pursuit of excellence. Fletcher, with the extra sensitive hearing, having been in-charge of an orchestra for years, can predict mistakes even before they happen. In this particular scene, Andrew had barely begun playing the first loop of the beat before Fletcher stopped him scathingly. He had predicted that at the pace that Andrew had begun the beat, he would rush and thereby ruin the combined performance of the band.
Here, one musical genius ends up pushing an average drummer to the level of a musical maestro.
In the start-up context, entrepreneurial genius often emerges from the collaboration of individuals who possess innovative ideas and shared passion. However, when these co-founders unknowingly embark on separate paths, the harmony that once drove them forward can disintegrate, leading the start-up towards inevitable downfall.
Research indicates that a staggering 62% of start-up failures can be attributed to conflicts within the founding team (Medium.com, 2017). Such conflicts are frequently underestimated and inadequately addressed, leaving founders blindsided by the destructive consequences.
In this article I want to talk about the 6 most common reasons why co-founders fight, in my experience.
1. Differing Visions about the future
Most co-founders already know and like each other before they decide to do business together. This is a good thing as a level of understanding is already established, but it can become a bad thing when certain things are taken for granted and thereby remain unsaid.
One place where this significantly hurts is when the founders have not communicated and agreed upon a vision for their company. Growth and success come at a blinding pace, and if the founders don’t have an agreed upon direction (how to scale up, terms for investors), differing visions can be a fatal blow that ends up disrupting the company’s growth trajectory.
2. Differing Values
Since industrial psychology emerged, HR involvement has become crucial for organizational functioning. Thus, having well-defined core values is considered essential. These values serve as blueprints for hiring preferences, internal policies, and decision-making regarding trade-offs between earnings and value addition. For start-ups, every day is filled with choices, such as prioritizing upscaling or providing better wages to boost team loyalty. These differences can escalate into conflicts, turning small fights into long-lasting disputes between co-founders.
3. The Moral high-ground and the Victim complex
For a healthy organization, it’s beneficial to have a diverse mix of people who can support each other and take on responsibilities when needed. This applies to founding members as well – the more diverse their expertise, the better equipped they are to handle various tasks.
However, opposing personalities can create challenges. Even if you’ve known your co-founder for a long time, you may discover that your personalities clash in certain situations. This clash can lead to one founder developing a superiority complex, believing they have the moral high ground, while the other may develop a victim complex, feeling personally targeted during important decision-making. Ego clashes are a common source of conflict in organisations, and these ongoing fights have the potential to create lasting cracks in the relationship between co-founders.
4. The Employees’ Favourite – Jealousy
Founders with different personalities often attract different types of employees, each aligning with a specific founder’s style. However, it’s not uncommon for one founder to be favoured over the other. This preference can stem from factors like the amount of time spent with employees (the more present founder being seen as the “real boss”), communication styles (empathetic communicators being preferred over introverted founders), and various other reasons. Sometimes, the roles can reverse, with one founder becoming the “bad cop” who works closely with employees, while the other becomes the “good cop” offering occasional encouragement. Whether this favouritism is real or just perceived by one founder, it often leads to feelings of jealousy that even strong relationships struggle to withstand.
5. Difference in style
Are you fast and furious or slow and steady? Are you a perfectionist or forgiving of mistakes? Do you prefer overseeing everything or blindly trusting your employees? Each leadership style has its pros and cons, and none is superior to the other. However, when founders have different leadership styles, they may perceive each other’s approaches as insufficient, too lenient, too demanding, or disruptive.
Similarly, there is a lot of discussion on the right way to communicate with employees. Some emphasize empathetic listening and emotional communication to foster a connection with employees, while others stress discrete information dissemination and strictly need-based communication for clarity. Conflict often arises when founders with these different communication styles clash over what constitutes effective communication. One founder may view the other as overly emotional, engaging in unnecessary sharing and taking professional debates personally. Conversely, the other founder may see the first as cold, distant, lacking empathy and care. This disagreement leads to circular arguments where founders try to convince each other that their way of leading or communicating is the right way, when in reality, there is no definitive answer.
6. Not feeling valued
Depending on the organization’s nature, one founder’s technical expertise may align more closely with the day-to-day functioning of the company. In such cases, the other founders might find themselves in a position where their role becomes merely symbolic, with limited interactions with employees and their contributions overshadowed or dismissed as insignificant or incompetent. This situation can lead to the devalued founder feeling undervalued and unappreciated.
When one founder becomes the primary face of the company in front of employees and customers, conflicts can arise among the founders. These conflicts stem from the invisible founder’s insecurity or the visible founder’s frustration over the perceived lack of commitment from their counterparts. In some cases, these conflicts can escalate to the point where the devalued founder is eventually ousted from the company.
If any of these seem like a problem you are facing currently, it might be time to seek professional help. Reach out to me here.
Authored by: Riti V. Srivastava
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